Today I woke up to my five little munchkins running into the bedroom and climbing up in bed to give me a good morning hug and kiss. Ethan was carrying a card with him that everyone had attempted to sign. They had practiced saying Happy Mother's Day, but decided they didn't want to say it at the last minute. They didn't have to. They show me everyday how much they love me. That is one of the greatest things about having toddlers. They love you more than life and show it everyday.
That was the extent of the celebration we had today. I did pull out the Mother's Day excuse every time we had to change diapers though. By the end of the day Rob told me that I was milking the Mother's Day thing. HeHe. We went to church and headed home to get the kids down for their nap. Rob and I took a short nap too. We played for a few hours in the evening and did the normal routine. Rob ended up in bed sick by about 5:30. I think it might have been something he ate. Hopefully he will feel better tomorrow.
Today was no different than any other day. I have to admit, this day means so much to me. I went to bed last night excited about today. Yeah, nothing big happened, but that isn't why I was excited. You see, from the time I was a little girl, I always assumed I would grow up and have a family. Four years ago we were faced with the struggle of infertility. We started our first cycle of treatments and were told it didn't work. A couple of weeks later I ended up in the ER with weird shoulder pain. It was there we were told that in fact we were pregnant. A few days later we lost our first child. It was an ectopic pregnancy and we were early in the pregnancy, but that doesn't matter. Anyone who has been pregnant knows that it doesn't matter how far along you are. A child is a child from the moment of conception. All of that happened in May. During Mother's Day.
There was a time I didn't think I could be a mother. It was a sadness I can't describe. But, the Lord was preparing me. He had plans for me. Plans I never imagined or expected. He had chosen me to be the mother to five little miracles. I still can't believe he chose me. It's a lot like when you find your soul mate. I still can't believe Rob chose me, but he did. God chose me out of all the millions of people. I'm sure there are lots of women out there who would do a lot better job than me. Women who have endless patience and never raise their voice. Women who can always find the positive in every situation. Women who always get dressed and do their hair and makeup. Women who have it together all the time and always put their best foot forward.
I may not have been the best pick when you look from the outside. But the Bible tells me that God knows what he is doing. So, I have to believe that I was the best person for the job. Besides, anyone who knows me knows that I don't go down without a fight. I am up to any challenge and will do whatever it takes to accomplish a task. Just when I think I don't have anything left in me, the thought of failure or defeat come to mind and I find that place deep inside that never quits. Maybe God knew what he was doing after all. Maybe, God gave me my little miracles because he knew I needed to have more patience. I have to believe that he knew anyone who has five kids at once will have to raise her voice just to be heard sometimes. And sometimes, when you have five kids sick with vomiting and diarrhea and you have to sleep in the living room because you and your husband are so sick that you can't stand to be close to each other, you just can't bring yourself to find the positive in EVERY situation. I think God knew that anyone who had five little miracles would be lucky to change out of her pajamas let alone do her hair or makeup. And I think God knew he had to find a woman who wasn't too proud to admit her shortcomings. Someone who embraced struggles and mistakes and learned from them.
That is why I was so excited about today. God chose me to be a mommy to five little miracles. He looked down 2 1/2 years ago and knew I was the one for the job. So, I am going to rise to the occasion and do my very best. This day reminded me of how blessed I am. I am so thankful that God chose me.
Hudson is 1 year old!
1 month ago